When my middle daughter was beaten severely by a former love interest several years ago, I wanted to hurt him BAD…just like he hurt my girl. Without going into the tiny details, she had fractures, teeth knocked out, and her face was so swollen I didn’t recognize her. As her Mom, I didn’t recognize my OWN DAUGHTER
I held onto the bitterness, hate, and resentment toward that man a long time. And it began to eat away at me. The day I decided that his actions would no longer destroy me was the first step in freeing my own self. I know what you’re thinking…”But what he DID!!…How can you…There is no way in hell I’d forgive that!”
1. In forgiving him, I didn’t make it ‘ok’ that he beat up my daughter.
2. In forgiving him, it didn’t mean I wanted to be his friend or allow him in mine or my daughter’s lives.
3. In forgiving him, it didn’t mean I no longer sought justice.
It meant that I let it go.
It meant I stopped drinking the poison of bitterness and anger.
It meant I released the infinite cycle of pain I was ruminating in.
By holding on to unforgiveness, you aren’t punishing him/her for hurting you. Holding onto bitterness and anger is not going to make things better. It’s not going to teach “them” a lesson. However, if we forgive and truly embrace love, we heal a part of our spirit, our soul, and our body.
Yes, sometimes it’s hard. But beautiful people, you can do hard things. The weak do not forgive. Forgiveness is definitely an attribute of the strong.
You are loved. You are capable. You are enough. You can be compassion. You can be kindness. And…you can experience forgiveness.
I love you.💙